As I sit on my bed beneath a pile of blankets, my coffee cup in one hand and my Bible laid out before me; I am poised to pen my next blog post when the Holy Spirit speaks and stirs my spirit.
Dear One, do you believe I AM the way, the truth, and the life?
My inner voice cannot hide the hurt associated with this question. Already, this conversation is strikingly familiar and I reply indignantly, “Of course, Lord. I believe You are who You say You are– You are Emmanuel; God incarnate who dwelt among us in the form of Jesus, who suffered an unjust and brutal death on a cross in an act of propitiation for our sin. You conquered death and rose victorious, satisfying the debt that must be paid so that we could enter into fellowship with You. You are the Creator, from which all things have its origin and assigned purpose. You are the rational principle that governs all things– Your Sovereignty is unparalleled. You are the embodiment of goodness, justice, peace, and truth. All beauty, love, and joy comes from You. You are the King of kings and the Lord of lords. The Wonderful Counselor, Mighty God, Everlasting Father and Prince of Peace. You define holiness, for You alone are blameless and without fault. All knowledge and wisdom come from You, Lord. You are faithful and true. You are marvelous, glorious, and mysterious. Your splendor is matchless. You are omnipotent, omniscient, and omnipresent. You are the great I AM. Jesus, You are my savior and my King.”
Megan, beloved, do you really believe those things?
Now I am in tears. “How could you ask me such a question, Lord? Yes! Of course I believe. How could I not?”
I wasn’t prepared for His response.
Then why do you keep such life changing truths to yourself?
In an attempt to rectify the situation, I cry out, “What of my children? I spend hours each day teaching them Your word and pointing them to You. That has to count for something, right?” (I don’t even know why I bothered. He already cut to the heart of the matter and I knew it. I just wanted to justify my behavior in my own mind, I suppose.)
He left me in silence to ponder His observation and it didn’t take me long to realize how accurate of an observation it was.
In truth, I am quick to pass along information I deem to be of some value to others: a new recipe I found on Pinterest, an interesting article from a syndicated journalist, the latest book from my favorite authors, YouTube videos, graphics depicting inclement weather… but how often do I sit across the table from someone and lovingly engage in a conversation about the one relationship that has altered my life so completely? If I really believe that Jesus is exactly who He says He is, then why do I hesitate to take advantage of the tools and resources He has entrusted to me and boldly proclaim, Jesus is Lord!
I believe it is because my heart is prone to wander.
I get distracted by the mundane tasks I must perform each day. I am a Martha, who desperately longs to have the heart of Mary, but doesn’t quite know how. Instead of being enthralled by the One who created me, who longs to fellowship with me each day, I am held captive by the circumstances of the life before me and I lose sight of what is important.
Lord, may Your goodness surround me and prevent me from wandering from the safety of Your Presence.
4. O to grace how great a debtor
Daily I’m constrained to be!
Let Thy goodness, like a fetter,
Bind my wandering heart to Thee.
Prone to wander, Lord, I feel it,
Prone to leave the God I love;
Here’s my heart, O take and seal it,
Seal it for Thy courts above.
-Penned by pastor and hymnist, Robert Robinson.